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Making sure everything works like it should

Hope to begin writing again soon. Im getting ready to begin a new School Year teaching HHED. Continue my Education and pick up writing again.  

I am trying to decide what I will be writing about. I know some changes are coming. Many prayers, more time listening for answers & guidance have pointed me in a few directions, some new some not. 

LadyJae

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Thinking about spectrum disorders, processing disorders and Temperaments

I was doing some reading earlier today about Natural Approaches to Processing Disorders, Autism, Aspergers, and other spectrum and non spectrum issues we face today.  I do not know how many are familiar with Temperaments or know their own Temperament, or the Temperaments of family members.  Often finding out the Temperament of someone diagnosed with the above issues will explain the behavior, moods, sleep, eating, learning styles and more. I know Spectrum disorders exist, I also know at times people are diagnosed when it can be explained by finding out the Temperament, learning about it, discovering if they are balanced or not. Learning the Temperaments of family members can change the way you look at them, treat them, react to them and that can change the way they treat you and react to you. If a person is not balanced it can be simple to fix.  By planning meals, exercise, meditation, sleep,,activities, outings, home time, sleep while keeping the needs   Often children, teens and adults will behave in ways that are not acceptable by societies standards and it leads to diagnosing with 1 or more of many disorders. It may be as simple as their personality and meeting their needs, making sure they have what they need in right amounts on a daily basis.  This is not always the case. Many truly are somewhere in the spectrum or other disorders/syndroms. Finding out the Temperament then can also be helpful for everyone involved. There are many quizzes, tests, and websites, facebook pages about Temperaments. Some have good accurate info, many have bad inaccurate info, especially if looking for it in regards to someone in the spectrum. So be very careful where your info comes from. If you have any questions Im happy to answer. I also do Temperament Consultations if you have questions or would like one.
I have more than 1 child diagnosed with Aspergers,  anxiety and more.  All benefit knowing their Temperament. It has helped me so much in knowing their needs. Knowing my own Temperament has also helped me understand my reactions to things so I can be aware and help them better.  Im not saying I have an instant cure. What I do have is possible help, understanding, information, new methods to deal and cope and above all HOPE that it can get better.  I hope to write a series of blogs dedicated to Temperaments and Spectrum disorders such as autism, Aspergers, ADHD and more. I would love to have questions from readers and clients that I can hopefully answer and make sure Iam addressing the needs of readers.  If you have questions but prefer to stay private feel free to PM me or email me. If you have questions and I answer them as part of the series I will not use names or personal information. I hope to hear from some of my readers. I have posted this to my facebook page for this blog as wel as here in hopes of more people asking questions. I truly want to answer your questions not just write things everyone already knows about.
LadyJaenh

Guest writer!

Hi there. My name is Kathleen, and I'm Autistic. I'll be thirty five this year. I'm married to the love of my life, and we have a fourteen year old son and twelve year old daughter. My son is diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. My daughter and I are both diagnosed with High Functioning Autism. I haven't lived with my parents since I was 15. The government has never given me any kind of special services or income assistance because of my ASD. Until very recently, I even earned more than my husband. None of these things are either good or bad, to be sought or avoided. They just describe how my life has happened to flow. Jae has invited me to contribute a monthly guest post from the view of an autistic adult, living independently. If there are particular questions you have, or ideas you'd like me to discuss, please comment or email Jae, or contact me over at my blog http://perplexingparent.blogspot.com/ Communication issues have been on my mind lately, so today I thought I'd share a little about them.

I wasn't diagnosed until I was in my mid twenties. I spent my life until then being “odd” or “stubborn” or just avoided. My mother loves to tell funny stories about me as a child. Being so different, there are plenty to chose from. She tells how I didn't talk until I was three, and then I never stopped. The doctor had said I was just being stubborn. A modern doctor might recognize that as being non-verbal. When I did finally talk, I often annoyed people with temporary changes to my patterns. Stutters, slurs, odd tones or accents. What they didn't realize was that I was struggling to process language. These were my tools for pushing past a mental wall. Without them, speech was just too complicated a task to perform at the moment. The rest of the time, I simply translated every thought into verbal form. Once I figured out how to start that process, it took me years to figure out how to control it. Honestly, I still struggle with knowing which thoughts I'm expected to share and which I'm expected to withhold.

As an adult, I've found more socially acceptable tools. The most important is simply preparation. Before engaging in an activity, I run through detailed mental simulations. I try to imagine every possible variable, and every possible interaction. I prepare at least a rough response and behavioral guidelines for each. That may sound exhausting. Sometimes it can be. I try to avoid going out, if that's the case. Either way, it's far better than having to do all that mental work on the spot for each and every interaction or choice that presents itself! When I first started using this technique, the result was that I had a few canned responses that I repeated over and over. It was obvious and not always appreciated. With more practice, my repartee has grown. I have a wide range of standardized behavioral rules to follow. I don't have to design new ones often. I have more canned responses, but I also have a variety of common variables to apply to those response. So, while I may be saying essentially the same thing to everyone....they can feel like they are also each receiving a unique and personalized response!

An easier, though not always appropriate, trick is a reliance on the digital age. When I'm having trouble with verbal communication, my husband and I will sometimes sit in the same room and instant message our conversation. The kids and I do this sometimes or write each other notes about things that might be faster to speak. Easier and faster aren't always the same thing. If a friend is comfortable enough with technology, I can even get away with texting her when we're in the same building or even room. It's often taken as being silly, as a kind of harmless secret that is found complimenting, even. I see the kids use this technique with their friends often. The younger the recipient, the more receptive they generally are to this. At the least, most of my socializing is done with friends locally or across the country via instant message or text. I can spend an entire afternoon with a friend one thousand miles away. We run errands and discuss everything we're doing and chat about our lives, all via text. To someone who isn't on the spectrum it may seem like we're missing out on the bonding and important bits. For me, and many of my friends, it's like I'm cutting out the part that interferes with the bonding and important bits. I do like to see my friends. I just don't like to see them nearly as often as I'd like to interact with them. In the past I've had to choose, but modern technology allows me to integrate much more comfortably into society.

From Grandmas point of view

I thought it would be nice to get another point of view. Not just mine, not just from a parents view but from a grandmas point of view. So the following is written by the grandmother of my children. She lives with us and has spent a lot of time with them.

      Being the grandmother of a child with Aspergers is a different kind of life, especially when you live with aspergers children. You never know what to expect. They can be sweet and loving very affectionate or very stand offish. They may or may not say "I love you" But make no mistake you know they do. 
They take everything to heart and very personal. 
Most Aspergers children are shy and don't make friends easily. They are extremely bright. They learn really fast and don't seem to forget. 
You need to be on your toes all of the time, if they catch you off guard you will probably have a good laugh. 
I love my Aspergers grandchildren, They have given me a lot of joy and some tears.

The Small Things

Sometimes we have a day going along with out any issues and then "BAM" out of the blue someone is a raging machine! Leaving you wondering what happened. You think, look around, and wonder what happened. You have kept the normal routine for the day, nothing varied through the day that you are aware of, so what happened. You talk to your child and he/she has no clue what triggered the rage. so now what do you do? 1st sit back, regroup wit a cup of tea or whatever relaxes you. Look around, think about the day, looking for anything out of the ordinary. 
We always think of the big things, the obvious things that trigger, and often we miss the smaller, and frequent triggers. We over look something as simple as moving a picture that hangs on the wall to a new location. To us it may be  nothing, not a big deal but to someone in the spectrum it is a big deal. It can cause major meltdown. 
Appliances or dishes in new places, new furniture, curtains can trigger your aspie or SN child. Did you move or add or remove something from your child's bedroom? Even cleaning it can be a trigger. 
Did your schedule vary even in the slightest way? All these things can trigger a rage. 
One way I have found to help cut down on rages is to teach my children that sometimes things change from the normal. As I teach them a new schedule, routine or just go over our normal daily routine I make sure to add "things can change and we may do things different than expected" After a while of this they got better at learning to accept change, sometimes. They are not perfect about it but it helps some, I see improvement. 
Always remember acceptance is so important. You must accept you SN child for who he/she is. Love them no matter what they do, unconditional love is so important. Patients, forgiveness, and always remember its not intentional, they do not plan to rage, they do not want to rage but they can not always control it. Sometimes as they get older and learn tools to cope they rage less and do better. 
Any questions? Please email me. If you want to see a specific topic covered here email me and let me know renaissancenh@gmail.com   in the subject line put "Spectrum"
Hope to get some feed back 
Jaelene H
Reflexologist, Typologist, Herbalist and Nutritional Health Consultant

Cheese alternatives for the dairy free diet

Cheese alternatives for the dairy free diet

One of the first things I am often asked is "what about cheese?" I then explain about vegan cheese, vegetarian cheese, tofu cheese, goat and sheep cheese. If you have a health food store or a health food section in your local store you should be able to find alternatives to cheese. Most carry Vegan cheese in the health food section. You can also find vegetarian cheese often but be careful and read labels they often have dairy in some form. If they have a frozen section you may want to check for frozen variations of dinner options for dinners that usually have cheese. For instance we have dairy free macaroni and cheese. They also have lasagna, bagels, muffins, burritos, tacos and more that are all dairy free. In Topeka you can go to to The Health Food Mart and get dairy free foods. They have a web site.They are located at 1507 SW 21st Street (21st & Washburn),Topeka, KS 66604. You can find their sale ads on their web site.

Another option to dairy free is to try cheese from goats and sheep. Often after a period of time away from all dairy a person is able to handle cheese, milk, dairy products from sheep and goats. The proteins are easier to break down than the proteins from a cow. Often the local Grocery stores will carry Goat cheeseand Sheep cheese. Some excellent cheeses are: Drunken Goat Cheese, Manchego Cheese and Some times Romano. Read the Labels on the cheese it will tell you what animal it comes from. Usually Goat cheese had a picture of goats on the front. Some cheese that is made from goats or sheep in other countries is not made the traditional way here, often they will substitute with cow milk.

Jaelene H

When we stray from our normal daily routine

Recently I couldn't figure out why we were having more rages than normal. When I was talking to Larry about it I realized our school schedule is so outta wack and far from our normal and the problem! So we are working on a new normal, and doing a lot of talking and hoe it works out and leads to a smooth road ahead of us.
What are some of the small things that can send your aspie or other in the syndrome rage or act out?
Normally if I know were coming to a change I give lots of warning but this one caught me off guard and I didn't see it coming. It is a reminder of how many things in life can have a negative effect on my children, things that are not even bad, but due to the aspergers causes raging and pain in them.
Just my thoughts for the day!
LadyJae

been a while since I have blogged

So I thought I better stick my head in and come up with something good to say! Were doing good. I have a newsletter going with a few topics, it seems to be expanding! I am thinking of including Living under the umbrella and still getting wet as part of it. I am just trying to figure out how exactly to work the news letter, and signing up for it. Right now it is part of my business web  site. I want to keep it part of business but not sure I like the set up now. That and I am considering expanding slowly so the newsletter becomes an online magazine eventually. I would like to have some guest writers, and cover a few areas. If anyone is interested in possibly being a guest writer let me know.
My Aspies are good for the time being. We have had a few more rages than normal the last few months as we have had major changes! Larry my husband is home again. And that changed a lot! caused some rages. We have been doing family therapy, need to do more. Also have Insurance now and they cover some excellent resources for Spectrum issues, so we may be using the resources available to us!
School is great for me. I am writing my thesis for my Masters on the topic of Spectrum and special needs and herbs. I am also writing a thesis paper for my masters in Nutrition, covering food allergies and intolerance, mainly dairy. It can have such a dramatic effect on a child it is unreal. If Chubby has any milk the difference in him is unreal, he will go from knowing his Alphabet to not recognizing any of them. His allergy is severe.
the other blogs are Craziness and Chaos   and Renaissance of Natural Health, My business web site
If you have any questions, input or comments please feel free to leave them or email me 

Pennies for Peter: SIMPLE Ways YOU Can help!

Pennies for Peter: SIMPLE Ways YOU Can help!: We are looking for Sponsors for the Following items! $50 to finish the quilts we will auction off on June 29th Graphic Design work to de...

looking for a smoother morning routine?

Read this article for a great way to feed a nutritious breakfast to your family while cutting down on some of the early morning chaos.  This breakfast is easily adaptable for most diet requirements and restrictions and still tastes great.
http://www.examiner.com/dairy-free-food-in-topeka/breakfast-the-easy-way-with-out-the-milk

Keeping it calm through the Holidays

Hopefully everyone survived Thanksgiving. Now we move forward to December with more celebrations to look forward to. If you Celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah or any of the other Celebrations during the month your sure to dread the effects of over stimulating the Autistic child. Finding ways to celebrate with out over stimulating and triggering rages and other reactions can be tricky. I have a few tips to help you survive and keep your hair attached to your head! I know I have had many Holidays that when done I am sure I had less hair than in the beginning! First stick to the schedule as much as you can. When the schedule will change remember to add it to the schedule ahead of time. Give enough warning and prep time for the child to understand and prepare for the change. I tell anyone I work with that change needs to be part of the routine. It helps them adjust when things are different. So if on the 7th your going to decorate the house start prepping now. Repeat that you will be putting away some of the items that are normally out all year long to decorate for Christmas. Make up a story about it, putting the=ings away to make room, pulling out the Decorations, sorting, going through them and putting them out. Remind the child, and family why your doing it, what your celebrating, how important it is, and do it daily until the big day. When the time comes take a few days ahead of time to pack up anything you need to put up to make room. Then when the biog day comes if your child is over whelmed and refuses to take part do not get upset, make sure he/she is ok, safe, and not harming anyone and then continue on. Many families try to minimize the change by using less decorations, use only your favorites, or only have a tree. There are ways to do it. We keep 2 Nativities out all year round. It makes it normal to have them out, and I think it is a beautiful decoration reminding me always of the Savior and what he has done for me. Many families have music going and it is a party to decorate. Sometimes this is to much stimuli for the Autistic/aspergers child. Turn down the music, or even off. Maybe you can spread out the days the decorating is done. Instead of 1 day to do it all take a week or more, doing a little each day. Many families have parties, Santa is invited to some, gifts exchanged and dinner. This is often to much for someone in the spectrum. You may have to skip out on the Large family parties, or go for a short time. Being prepared to leave. It is good to teach your child a signal, when it is to much and he is about to be over stimulated and realizes it, a way to let you know can be helpful. Then you can quietly excuse the family and go home, or maybe a time out away from everyone, where he can have a few moments of quiet solitude and regroup. For older Aspergers. Autistic children this sometimes works. Allowing them to take part but escape for a brief period when they need. A spot to sit alone can make it possible to attend family functions. Even if it is in the car, allow it if it helps. Make sure to take safe foods for your family if there are any special diet requirements. and also comfort foods. Sometimes a favorite food is very comforting during chaos, and can help avoid over stimulating during the meal. Stick up for your child and do not allow others to tease or set off. There are many ways to make it possible to attend family functions. But for the times that it is just not do able skip it and do something at home. If it makes your child miserable it is not worth it. And if you really must attend but your child is not up to it find an alternative for the child that they are happy with. I suggest this as a last resort for those who must attend for some reason. Remember the Holidays are to be enjoyed but we all have a different comfort level. It is important to make sure everyone feels safe, loved, and part of the celebrations without over stimulating. This can be hard but can be done. Take it slow and remember family is most important! If you have any questions please feel free to email me ladyjae@renaissanceofnaturalhealth.com Jaelene H. Merry Christmas!

If you have an Aspergers child, or anyone else in your home has an allergy to dairy or intolerance here is an awesome way to be able to enjoy a great dessert and not worry about the dairy. Add your favorite herbs and spices and make it nutritious and delicious! I make Black Rice pudding using herbal tea and water and coconut milk. I add cinnamon, Good Earth sweet N Spicy tea, Ginger, Nettle leaf, Roasted Dandelion, and whatever else I feel like to the water and again to the coconut milk. The recipe is 2 Cups  black rice                                             6 Cups water                                                                                         Spices and herbs                                                                                                            3 tea bags of any packaged tea used              3 TBS any loose spice or Herb used                                                                 Bring to boil then simmer until water is gone      usually takes an hour or more Add 1 cup sweetener- sugar, brown, sugar, stevia, or honey. You can use more or less according to your taste and 1 package coconut                                              Add 4 -6 Cans Coconut Milk so it is liquidy again. Stir well and simmer again until Thickened and rice is soft. If you use this recipe you can change anything, add your favorite tea or herbs,  try with almond milk also.                                   For a change in chocolate or Vanilla Pudding try some of the following ideas. Choose your milk substitute first. Water, Hemp Milk, Almond Milk, Coconut Milk or Rice milk are my favorite options. Measure the amount of liquid needed for the recipe, and add herbal tea. If I use packaged tea bags I use 2 bags per cup of liquid. If I am using loose Herbal tea I use 3-5 TBS per cup depending on how strong I want it and the type of Herb being used. I use a tea ball or muslin tea bag for this. I steep for at least 20 minutes. Sometimes longer, you can sit it in the fridge covered overnight if you want.  Remove herbal tea and continue with recipe as normal. There are so many ways to change pudding using spices and herbs. Use your imagination. Cloves, Orange peel, ginger, Raspberry herb and chocolate mint tea in chocolate or vanilla pudding.  Use chamomile at night for a relaxing dessert to help mellow out the kids. Rose Hips are great in Vanilla Pudding. Orange ginger in Vanilla is a nice twist as well!

foods effects

So a while back we had to cut out dairy for chubs. He gets none, and we cut out gluten for a month to see what happens. We ended up going to gluten again but less of it, we now use a lot of rice, potato, sorghum, tapioca,and anything gluten free. The only time we use anything else is if its whole wheat.
So how does this fit? We discovered that Chubs angry outbursts, the raging lets up to almost gone as long as he gets no dairy. If he has even a small amount wow watch out, he is violent, screaming, freaking over everything, refuses to do what he is asked, and can not retain anything he is taught. Take away dairy and he retains it better! it is amazing. So I made everyone go dairy free for a short time. I noticed a difference in them all. Unfortunately some refuse and so I am slowly working everyones milk into being dairy free milk. They all have it more often than they know, they always love whats cooked. I cant get them to drink it yet. Hope soon.
The gluten we went without 1 month. I think we need a redo and for it to be a few months to really know. I am fairly sure someone will have an issue of some kind. That starts next month.
Dyes play a role also, avoid them and artificial colorings of all kinds, artificial flavors as well.
I have discovered a few items that contain one form of milk or another, for someone with a severe reaction this could be bad, it could be the cause of morning or bedtime battles, or sickness.
One toothpaste! Can you believe it!
Dairy is something many react to and are not aware of it. If you are dealing with a dairy allergy here is a list of the various names it goes under on labels. I write a column on eating dairy free you can follow for ideas, recipes, and also ask questions and I will respond if possible to help. Check out examiner.com/dairyfree-food-in-topeka/jaelene-huffman                                                             

Acidophilus milk

Ammonium caseinate

Artificial butter flavor

Artificial flavors / flavoring

Brown sugar flavoring

Butter

Butter fat

Butter flavor

Butter solids

Buttermilk

Calcium caseinate

Caramel Color

Caramel Flavoring

Casein

Caseinate

Cheese (All)

Coconut Cream Flavoring

Condensed milk

Cottage cheese

Cream

Curds

Custard

Delactosed whey

Demineralized whey

Dry milk powder

Dry milk solids

Evaporated milk

Fat Replacers - Brands such as Dairy-Lo® and Simplesse® are made with milk protein

Galactose

Ghee

Half-and-half

High Protein Flour

Hydrolysates

Hydrolyzed casein

Hydrolyzed milk protein

Hydrolyzed vegetable protein

Iron caseinate

Lactalbumin

Lactalbumin phosphate

Lactate

Lactic Acid Starter Culture

Lactoferrin

Lactoglobulin

Lactose

Lactulose

Magnesium caseinate

Malted milk

Margarine

Milk (whole, lowfat, and skim)

Milk derivative

Milk fat

Milk powder

Milk protein

Milk solids

Natural egg flavor

Natural flavors / flavoring

Non-Dairy - This does not mean milk-free, it indicates 1/2% or less milk by weight

Nougat

Potassium caseinate

Protein - The added protein in foods is often milk protein

Pudding

Recaldent

Ready sponge

Rennet casein

Sodium caseinate

Sodium lactylate

Sour cream

Sour milk solids

Soy Cheese - Often contains milk protein

Sweetened condensed milk

Whey

Whey powder

Whey protein concentrate

Whey protein hydrolysate

Yogurt

Zinc caseinate

Goat's milk is avoided also. Some people may be able to handle milk after a while of dairy free. Talk to your doctor or a Nutritionist about this possibility. Goats milk has smaller fat globules and they break up easier in the stomach.

Walk for Autism

I am participating to the 3rd Annual Autism CARE Walk at Heartspring on April 10, 2010, and I want you to join me. The Autism CARE Walk raises awareness about autism spectrum disorders in our community and across the nation. This year's walk will be approximately 2 miles and will start and finish on the Heartspring campus at 8700 E 29th St North in Wichita.

Visit http://tinyurl.com/yapn2bp to join Huffin Family and support autism awareness today.

Come join us walking 

new links and info

I have ran into a few sites I had not seen before. They have good information so I wanted to share!
So here they are
First is a newspaper column and reading through back issues is very informative. You can subscribe to it as well.
http://www.examiner.com/x-16063-Autism--Adolescence-Examiner~y2010m2d6-One-small--step-towards-selfregulation-How-to-teach-your-teen-with-autism-to-request-a-break

This one requires a paid membership. I am unsure if its worth it or not, but you can listen to a few webinars free and decide for yourself. moms fighting autism

behavior charts

http://www.autismresourcecenter.info/help_books.htm

http://www.autistics.org/library/booklist.html

http://autismspectrum.tripod.com/

http://www.aspergers-and-pdd.com/home-schooling-aspergers.html

http://www.autismspeaks.org/community/chapters/index.php

http://www.aspergersyndrome.org/

http://www.familiestogetherinc.org/

http://www.familiestogetherinc.org/Spotlight.html

http://www.bookshare.org/

One small step towards self-regulation: How to teach your teen with autism to request a break

One small step towards self-regulation: How to teach your teen with autism to request a break

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Free E Book

Having a contest everyone that posts a link to my site www.renaissanceofnaturalhealing.com between now and April 1st gets entered into a drawing!  The winner will receive a free ebook with Natural remedies good for a variety of things. If your a parent or other with someone in the spectrum make sure to let me know and I will send you specific info about the Spectrum and things we have done to help! If your interested in learning more let me know! If you leave my link online anywhere make sure to let me know where! you can email me to let me know ladyjae@essencethrutheages.com

playing more

     ~Jaelene

  www.essencethrutheages.com
www.renaissanceofnaturalhealing.com
www.mompack.com
"There is no one perfect way to be a good mother. Each situation is unique. Each mother has different challenges, different skills and abilities, and certainly different children. The choice is different and unique for each mother and each family. Many are able to be 'full-time moms,' at least during the most formative years of their children's lives, and many others would like to be. Some may have to work part- or full-time; some may work at home; some may divide their lives into periods of home and family and work. What matters is that a mother loves her children deeply and, in keeping with the devotion she has for God and her husband, prioritizes them above all else."
M. Russell Ballard